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Archive Stories
Archived stories from Jan 2007

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Riskbitz guide to buzzwords

Have you ever experienced that embarrassing moment in a meeting when your marketing manager looks at you and says something you simply don?t understand, like: ?I?m tasking you with re-engineering our CRM function, to create free value and make it pop.?

Thinking outside the box

Worry not. We at RISKbitz know a thing or two about jargon and fashionable buzzwords. Moreover, we?re willing to share our shit with you, so that you can busk it with the best of the other guys in the weekly thought shower.

Thinking outside the box is a much used euphemism that has its origins in Lloyd?s. It came into common usage as teleworking grew in popularity. If a Lloyd?s underwriter is ?thinking outside the box? it means they are working at home today, or ?skiving?.

Executives often use agricultural references in meetings and statements. ?Organic growth? is a term used by chief executives to describe their strategy to analysts and investors. It means the company?s growth will be barely discernible over the coming year and if the weather is bad, the company may well be blown away altogether. If someone has a ?silo mentality? it means that their head is full of grain [Bart, are you sure about this one? Ed].

Where an acquisition takes place, the term accretive to earnings is often heard. As a general rule, an accretive acquisition occurs when the P/E ratio of the acquiring firm is not quite as bad as that of the target firm, which is rotten.

The term tipping point is closely associated with climate change. It refers to the moment when an insurance boss realises he can no longer ignore the implications of global warming and immediately orders a PR minion to put out a press release exhorting someone to do something about it.

An integrated risk solution is where an insurance company takes all the old individual risk products it couldn?t sell to commercial clients and squashes them together to make a single big new one. A ?holistic solution? is a big squashed together policy that is full of holes. IT people like to talk about scaleable solutions. A scaleable solution is one that gets bigger and more expensive in line with the problem that you are trying to solve. More crazy buzzwords next week?

Other news from Jan 2007
Travelating the Wave of Insurability
the serious stuff
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