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Archived stories from 2007

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Teenager "disses" Lloyd's day out

In contrast to the success of Lloyd?s ?Take Your Daughter To Work Day?, the market?s inaugural ?Take Your Teenage Son To Work Day? has been described as a disaster ? by both parents and adolescents. ?Lloyd?s is like, so totally sad,? said Luke Smith, 14. ?Everyone is just like my dad ? a sad loser retard.?

The day got off to an inauspicious start when most Lloyd?s parents were unable to wake their teenage sons in time to catch the commuter train into work. Many didn?t arrive at Lime Street until after lunch. ?It was like in the middle of the night when my dad came in stinking of aftershave saying it was time to get up and go to work,? teenager Smith told RISKbitz.

Smith Senior said that the journey to work had been further complicated by his son?s inability to keep his baggy trousers up during the walk to the railway station. ?I remedied the situation by lending Luke my own belt. However we missed the train because Luke had forgotten to bring his mobile phone and had to go back to get it,? Lloyd?s underwriter David Smith said. ?And then he had to go back again to fetch his iPod.?

When the duo finally arrived at Lloyd?s they were delayed by an argument over Luke?s refusal to continue wearing the ?minging? belt and whether Luke should lower the hood of his hoodie once inside the Lloyd?s building. ?I couldn?t believe it when Dad said we had to stay there all afternoon. It was like, worse than school. Durr,? Luke said. ?The least sad bit was showing some of my Dad?s stupid mates how to use their computers.?

A spokesman for Lloyd?s said that the institution?s future as the world?s pre-eminent specialist insurance market depended on it being able to recruit and retain outstanding young talent. ?For that reason, we are about to embark on a recruitment drive in South East Asia,? the Lloyd?s spokesman said.


Other news from Jan 2007
 
Travelating the Wave of Insurability
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